Hergest Ridge

Here’s what I have to deal with on an ongoing basis:

• “I know you have a system of dealing with these kind of things, but I’m special.” Yes, indeed.
• “What is your blog about?” I’m so happy you asked. Reading is so 1990ies.
• “Why aren’t you married yet?” Because I’m still tossing around ideas on pulling it off with a guarantee you won’t show up.
• “Drinking alone is a sign of oncoming alcoholism.”
  “Okay… Do you want to drink with me?”
  “No, I don’t drink.”
• “A bit more to the left” – said the blind man with a cane, to the sharpshooter with a scope.

I’m sure there are others, but I’ll end it while the momentum is still strong. Maybe it’ll catapult you into my previous entry, which has been described by the New York Times as “One of the most ground-breaking and provocative blog entries of 2006″. If you find the link to the review, send it my way.

Last few weeks I’ve really been itching to take a trip somewhere… and I don’t mean taking my car out of town, as I’ve been doing as a substitute for the real thing.

Here are some things that might help you deal with the bug, should it have found you as well:

• Take your car out of town and try to get lost (bet you didn’t see that one coming)
• Watch travel shows. Lots of travel shows.
  Result: “With so many place to go, how can I pick just one?”
  You’ll need time to sort that one out, and by then you are hopefully ready to book that flight.
• Work lots. The more money, the more places you can go. In the meanwhile, you’re too busy to think about travel.
• Get your passport in gear. As exciting it sounds, you’ll be a step closer to your destination. You’ll feel better for a day or two.
• Write a step-by-step blog entry with tips on how to deal with the bug. For a limited amount of time, it’ll make you feel like you’re in control of the whole situation. Speaking from experience, the sense of “progress” does wear off rather quickly. Bummer.
• Read my blog. There’s enough here for a good chance of lapsing into a ‘lil coma, helping the time pass some more.

But really, I couldn’t care less if you read my blog or not. My stats counter is broken anyway; It keeps showing (1 Visitor) and (2 Visitors) per day on regular basis. So yeah, I won’t know if you read my blog or not, because as I already said, “my stats counter is busted”.

Als ich Heute von den BNI Mitgliederversammlung zurück kam, dachte ich an eine Zeile von “Zeit zu leben Zeit zu sterben”. Ich weiß nicht genau Wer in der Buch sie spricht, aber die geht irgend wie “Du Zitterst nicht. Das leben Zittert in Dich. Es ist mehr vernünftig als Wir”. Read the rest of this entry »

With his eyes almost shut, the gray creature stood at the entrance to the cave. Keeping guard, watching. Its tail long, part on the ground, part high in the air. The slightest sound will cause this sentry to stir, shift, and investigate.

In the cave behind, another one sleeps. Soon, he’ll take the place outside of the cave and the role of the guard. As long as the cave is not large enough to house both creatures at the same time, they’ll interchange their positions out of necessity. Their system a mystery, no one knows who’s left to guard, and who’s the lucky one to rest in peace.

They carry no weapons nor armour, for their fangs and large, yellow, sharp teeth are all the defense they require. For the most part, they will keep to themselves, and if left unprovoked will use their natural weapons for peaceful tasks. Tasks like digging new caves and marking territory with teeth and claw marks where ever possible.

Please feed the gerbils anytime, preferably with seeds.

You can find these creatures on my desk, their names Dopey and Rudolph. Companions, friends, and bundles of happiness on any given day.

In the lobby, I skipped checking the mailbox.

I arrived at my meeting address with a few minutes to spare, an empty parking spot right at the front door. The spot was the kind that stays free for a minute or two at a time, literally steps away from the high rise entrance. Parking meter still had a few minutes on it, a much needed commodity due to lack of proper coinage on my part. The car was left with 0:24 flashing on it.

With the 10 minute meeting due in 5 minutes, things were going to be tight. That was the forecast.

“You’re a Farmer, and that’s the type of people we are looking for”.

Jeff sat across of me at his desk on the 26th floor, above an intersection where movie studios like to shoot when they need a “busy New York scene” while filming in Canada.

Suddenly it all clicked into place.

A few days ago I had watched an episode of Lost. In it, a character explains a sweat-lodge to another. About how it can help you find who you are; a Hunter or a Farmer. At the time I wondered if I was either, but here, high above the ground with the answer given to me by a near stranger, it all made sense.

It’s been 40 minutes since the car was left at the meter. When I came out of the elevator, I knew it hadn’t been towed – I could see it through the stained glass – but the question of a ticket was still to be answered.

Empty handed, I was sitting in the car, the door shut. A few meters away, a man in a uniform was heading my way. Another 15 seconds, and I’d be waiting for him to write me a ticket.

When I was getting out of the car back at my apartment, I noticed a golden coin in the door of the car. It was sitting in the little door handle with a bottom, a place where I often toss in my pennies. Well, I’ll be damned! Where was this little coin when I was looking to feed the hungry meter? It didn’t matter.

Some things couldn’t turn out better if I had tried to plan for it. Today, it seems to have all started with the conscious decision not to waste precious seconds checking what in the end turned out to be an empty mailbox. If you ask me, I’d call it a micro chaos theory unfolded.